Wishing for days like today

I hung up a picture to remember my wishes. This picture is to remind me of all the ways and days that we wished for her. We wished for her in Beaver Falls with a wish rock we picked up on the cruise to Nova Scotia. We wished for her there on the beach when we were mourning from our first miscarriage. We wished for her safe delivery into the world with our friends camping.

I want to remember my emotions, the awe I feel from the bottom of my gut that we made her. That I carried around a baby in my belly. The love that I feel when I look at her nursing at night time. Her little hands and tiny nose. Pure amazement.

I want to remember the days like today. My first day away from my daughter. I cried, I was so sad. I was leaving my baby. I want to remember missing her, coming home and giving kisses and smelling her.

I had a great day at work, I felt so welcomed and appreciated, and I came home to my husband who had a bouquet of flowers sitting on the counter, holding our baby cooking the mac and cheese I set out for dinner the night before. I want to remember the feeling of accomplishment at the end of this day. I am staring at my baby on the monitor, cuddling with my husband with the laundry going.

I have been wishing for days like today. I can't wait for tomorrow.